HDU #2: Dirt Read online

  Dirt: The Sequel to HDU

  india lee

  Copyright © 2013 India Lee Books

  All Rights Reserved

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or people, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  HDU

  The Rules

  1. This is a celebrity news site. All comments must be about celebrities, unless your life is inexplicably interesting. So basically, keep it celeb-related.

  2. Commenting “First!” will get you banned. Consider it a favor from us, for you’ve embarrassed yourself.

  3. Trolling is for try-hards, so don’t do it. Whatever.

  4. NO LINKING TO POP DINNER. POP DINNER IS NOT A VALID SOURCE.

  5. Don’t fight each other unless someone is being a serious unredeemable asshole.

  6. Have fun and this may sound batshit crazy, but try to be nice! I know it’s the Internet but feelings still exist and shit.

  — PK

  LIAMANDA’S BACK!

  The Pop Source

  June 28th

  After eight grueling weeks of shooting in Jordan, Liam Brody returns to the States today and to the girl waiting back home, Amanda Nathan — who celebrates her 23rd birthday tonight! Hosted by new PR queen Wendy Krentz, Nathan will be reuniting with her soldier sweetheart at booze-free hotspot, Agno (reportedly chosen to accommodate friend and recent rehab graduate, Ian Marsh).

  Since an early visit to set in the Jordanian city of Amman, Nathan has gone a near three months without seeing on-again beau, Brody, who sustained several ghastly on-set injuries while filming the Terrence Rambis biopic A Soldier. Reports allege that Nathan, who visited Brody following his first injury, spent much of the past few weeks pleading with her boyfriend to utilize a stunt double. Unfortunately for the worried girlfriend, those pleas fell upon deaf ears as Brody opted to perform each of his own stunts, continuing his strong lobby for an Academy Award.

  As most Rambis films are, A Soldier is already an Oscar frontrunner and has reportedly gleaned from Brody the most powerful and transforming performance of his career – a portion of which can be seen in the actor’s extra hunky new build! According to on-set trainers, the already-built Brody packed on over ten pounds of pure muscle during his eight weeks in Jordan, which allegedly included impossibly difficult training exercises from the actual pararescue training pipeline! According to sources on set, Brody impressively completed actual combat, diving, airborne, and basic survival skills during his character bootcamp and acquired both the physical and mental state of an elite Special Ops soldier.

  Hopefully, the convincing act will shoot Brody to the A-list’s elite! Along with a possible Oscar, sources report that Rambis has already pegged the heartthrob to star in his next film, The Legends, the upcoming action flick that’s sparking buzz for its star-studded ensemble cast and staggering budget of $218 million. Reports allege that the film will be delivering Brody his very first $20 plus million paycheck, which would certainly mark the first step of his induction into the upper crust of Hollywood.

  Looks like it’ll be a breakout year for the man whose dating history once outshone his acting career. For Brody, change has sure been good!

  LEADOFF VS. LEGACY

  A Tale of Two Identical Shows

  Celeb-o-Matic

  June 28th

  We just can’t help but compare. And no, it’s not just because Casey Mulreed decided to name her show Legacy, which is strikingly similar to Tom Vogel’s Leadoff. And it’s not because of the possible rivalry between America’s Former Sweetheart, Miss Mulreed, and America’s Unofficial New Sweetheart, Amanda Nathan, who has been hired to the writing staff of Leadoff and whose resumed friendship with filmmaker Ian Marsh is said to have complicated relations with Mulreed.

  No, it’s because both shows were picked up at the same exact time, will premiere on the same exact date on heatedly rival networks and both center around beautiful, young people on their tumultuous paths to fame in New York. And while ZINC, which picked up Leadoff, boasts 29 million subscribers to their top ranked premium cable network (a good 9 million more subscribers than Legacy’s network, Cinereel), word has it that network presidents are livid over the fact that Cinereel finally has a probable smash hit on its hands.

  For so long, ZINC has kept Cinereel in a perpetual second place in premium cable network rankings, but with Cinereel’s recent surge in subscribers thanks to its new online streaming package, Simon perhaps has a reason to feel threatened. Especially since ZINC has recently been accused of failing to adapt to the new generation of viewers and being too “old-fashioned.” What was once seen as classy programming is now deemed slow-paced, tedious and a little boring.

  Perhaps it’s time for Cinereel to be top dog? Let’s make predictions based on an early comparison.

  PLOT: Legacy is said to be an outstanding script by those who have had early access — a very distinct and different voice, not one that people knew Mulreed was capable of writing since she’s never written before. Vogel’s script is also said to be outstanding, but slow-paced and deliberate compared to Mulreed’s drama-at-every-turn story.

  VERDICT: A virtual tie. The styles are vastly different but both are very good.

  CAST: Both productions have casted Hollywood newcomers to give the show a very real vibe. The leading ladies of Legacy, who are the alleged depictions of 19-year-old Casey Mulreed and best friend Jamie Nasri, are unknowns but absolute stunners. Meanwhile, Kyle Laurie, who plays Milo in Leadoff, is likely to make the ladies squeal and swoon all throughout the Fall season. The one up that Vogel’s show has this time around is the recent casting of Bond girl and Hollywood veteran, Zoe Mercury, as Milo’s on-and-off girlfriend.

  VERDICT: Leadoff 1 Legacy 0

  HYPE: Obviously, everyone has been talking about Mulreed’s Legacy as it is likely a true-to-life portrayal of her own road to addiction — an addiction that she only recently came out with, though not on her own terms. Some may remember that Mulreed’s rumored ex-fling, Ian Marsh, released a video of her confession to alcoholism and addiction, which was vicious but actually quite timely considering the buzz that it’s created for the premiere of Legacy. Over at ZINC, we hear the marketing budget for Leadoff is quite low considering the show’s staggering $8 million per episode budget, so not a whole lot of buzz unless you count tabloid stories about Amanda Nathan. Which actually do count, considering everyone’s wondering what’s going on between her and Mulreed, especially now that they’re working on rival TV shows. We need answers!

  VERDICT: Leadoff 1 Legacy 1

  SHOWRUNNER: This is very basic. It’s veteran vs. Rookie in the battle of showrunners, and despite the Oscar nominations and royal Hollywood blood and the ability to eventually do it all, Tom Vogel gets the point against Casey Mulreed when it comes to running a show. The man’s been pumping out hits since Casey’s middle school days.

  VERDICT: Leadoff 2 Legacy 1

  Looks like Leadoff will take the cake. Does this mean that industry rookie Amanda Nathan actually has some sort of career advantage over Casey Mulreed? She already stole the title of America’s Sweetheart — is she set to steal another? Next big TV writer, perhaps? Will Leadoff vs. Legacy ultimately become Nathan vs. Mulreed?

  Time will only tell. As far as premieres go, thank God we only have to wait till September.

  REUNITED AND IT FEELS SO GOOD GOD LIAM GOT HUGE

  HDU via The Durt

  June 28th

  You know how you were going to just say that you watched A Soldier to sound like the type of person who could sit through a three-hour political war drama? Or were only going to watch it right before the Oscars so you could s
ound smart and participate in award season discussions?

  Well, now you’re actually going to eagerly watch it. The day it comes out. Because Liam Brody.

  From the looks of it, the guy spent his time in Jordan eating a Costco-sized carton of raw eggs a day while bench-pressing Terrence Rambis and a stack of crew members between takes. Seriously though, we’re hearing that production had to install an especially sturdy exercise bar on-set because Liam so often spent his down time doing 100-pound weighted pull-ups. You heard me. While I can only do one pull-up of questionable authenticity, Liam can apparently do a set of ten with two fifty-pound weights strapped to his midsection (yes, this is an exercise that people do for non-torture reasons). So, yeah, all signs point toward Liam Brody being a descendent of Hercules, and Rambis agrees.

  Said director, Rambis, “Liam’s unreal work ethic is part of why A Soldier has become my proudest piece of work in a twenty plus-year career. I have been living, eating and breathing this film and I can confidently say that Liam has too.

  He has mastered the type of impossible training that an actual airman would have to complete to become pararescue, and that in itself is an accomplishment to be proud of for life. But in addition to that, I truly believe that Liam should win an Oscar for his efforts in Soldier — he transformed both his mind and body completely. He gave 110% to this film.”

  A hundred and ten percent plus a good chunk of his own health and personal safety, apparently. While shooting, Liam broke his hand and dislocated a shoulder within the first week and kept on truckin’, even through some nasty, stitch-requiring lacerations, only stopping when a shattered elbow took him down for a few weeks. Even then, Liam reportedly got agitated with doctors and insisted on continuing production, nearly getting his way until new BFF Rambis stepped in to insist on rest and rehabilitation – after all, he’ll be needing Liam in full health to take the starring role in the highly anticipated action-thriller, The Legends (Meanwhile, you’re imagining how hot Liam Brody probably is when he’s mad. Don’t worry, I was too).

  Anyway, A Soldier is nearly finished shooting but the true good news is that Liam’s back in the States for us to more accessibly ogle via paparazzi shots, assuming his newly heightened beauty doesn’t break camera lenses, because woof.

  By the way, does this make Amanda Nathan, America’s Unofficial Sweetheart, the Most Hated Woman Alive now because she gets to see Liam naked?

  Probably not. The world’s still pretty enamored with lil’ Miss Nathan, who will finally tell all and in her first big magazine feature this month. According to sources, Fleur Magazine nabbed the official interview with Amanda, who spent her Liam-less month of April preparing for work at the ZINC offices in Midtown. Seems that life is finally good and peaceful for Amanda after a winter of madness early this year.

  Which brings us to our last news item, filed under “Does Anybody Give A Shit?”

  Ian Marsh has yet to relapse, crash a party or ruin any lives in his first two weeks out of rehab, which is a victory in itself. Interestingly enough, the industry leper has actually won over a couple hearts since coming out of rehab and publishing his candid rehab diary online, which surprisingly, is less about himself and more about giving advice on how to avoid the humiliating path he took thanks to addiction. And while most of his fans are thirteen-year-old Tumblr addicts who can’t resist his floppy boy band hair, Ian actually managed to intrigue a high-quality ally in socialite wild child-turned-health and beauty guru, Harper Gunn. The two rehab grads have been spotted together several times at Agno, Harper’s newly opened vegan eatery in Flatiron, which, of course, is also booze-free. Does this mean that Ian will be wasting your popcorn by not being a total trainwreck this summer? Possibly, but have no fear.

  For every rehabilitated screw-up in Hollywood, there are at least two new careers beginning their nosedives. It’s just the rule. So here’s to a summer of good, dirty celebrity drama. May there be some deliciously juicy meltdowns for us to sip sangria to. ;)

  TOP COMMENTS

  mrstylerchase

  goddamnit i am entirely too obsessed with liamanda is this healthy

  Honeybee423

  yes.

  bailey21390

  ok i know casey mulreed is supposed to be invincible or whatever but is she really not going to admit herself into rehab? kind of setting a shitty example by just waltzing around like she can magically cure this on her own. pretty sure it’s rare that people can.

  R0X1E

  are you kidding all writers and showrunners are addicts it’s a requirement

  Chapter 1

  As the town car rolled up to the front of the iconic building on Fifth Avenue, Amanda felt her eyes widen, her awe just about equal to her embarrassment.

  “This… is all for me?”

  Last year, she had celebrated her birthday at her modest shared apartment in St. Louis. Her guests were mostly coworkers and her outfit for the night had been borrowed from the closet of her then roommate and best friend, Megan, who was about three inches taller and two sizes narrower. She had insisted Amanda wear the slinky black thing but after a few too many drinks, giggled in front of the party of ten guests and described Amanda’s look as “sausage-y.” The highlight of the night had ended up the slice of birthday cake that Amanda enjoyed solo on the fire escape. It was a red velvet cake that she had baked herself, that no one had touched because they’d forgotten about cake after too many of Megan’s famous jello shots. Singing “Happy Birthday” had slipped even the mind of her then boyfriend, Brandt. But to his credit, he’d purchased the cheap sparkling wine that Amanda ended up enjoying her cake with straight out of the bottle. It was his birthday gift to her, along with a vending machine necklace and Starbucks gift card, both purchased directly before the party from the mall that he worked at.

  That day felt like eons ago as Amanda gaped out the window of the ridiculous black Bentley she rode in with Wendy Krentz, blinking at the scene of flashing lights and cameras outside of Flatiron’s new hotspot, Agno.

  That birthday last year hadn’t even been one of the bad memories. A bad memory was catching Brandt cheating on her with Megan five months later. It was being banished back home to Merit, Missouri, to a life of small town monotony where her days and nights revolved around moderating HDU and spreading anonymous vitriol about a Hollywood playboy and “womanizing douchelord” whom she really only hated for being Megan’s favorite actor. The rumors, the bad press, the unflattering stories — she’d posted them solely out of bored, spiteful bitterness. And because that kind of indoor hobby nicely complemented her only other hobby of avoiding nosy neighbors like the plague.

  How was that my life just six months ago? Amanda wondered as she smoothed down the front of this year’s dress. It was black like the one she’d worn last year, but that was about the only similarity since this time around, the dress belonged to her and rather than cheap lycra and spandex, it was constructed of beautiful jersey and lace — halter neck and floor length with a lace panel down the front and subtle but daring slit up the side, reaching just above the middle of her thigh. It was a show stopper plucked straight from the Spring/Summer collection by Thierry Marc, one of the many designers now represented by Wendy, who since leaving her post as editor-at-large with June Magazine had started her own quickly thriving PR firm. While there had been no contract yet, her role as Amanda’s publicist was assumed and all but officially signed.

  Amanda laughed to herself. Truly, the color of her dress was just about the only similarity to her entire birthday in St. Louis last year.

  Because now, she lived in New York as a television writer and the girlfriend to that very Hollywood playboy whom she used to personally slander as a “womanizing douchelord.” Liam Brody was her boyfriend. Their relationship was no longer the product of a contract or publicity stunt. They were an actual couple now.

  It had just yet to feel that way.

  But from what she understood from Wendy about Hollywood romances, there was often a
whole lot of not seeing one another. Relationships developed at the speed of light and then slowed down to the pace of a snail thanks to the ridiculous amounts of work and travel. With Liam finally coming home, Amanda hoped that they could find a happy medium. She was ready to get to know him beyond the drama of the past six months. It had struck her that the drama was really all they’d shared together — that the most personal thing she even knew about Liam was that he had a brother whom he deeply admired. That was it. They’d been through chaos together and thanks to it, there hadn’t been time to get to really know each other, to spend quality time with one another. More than any other birthday gift, Amanda wanted that. As corny as it was, she wanted to understand Liam, to hear about his friends, his family, his past, his hopes for the future.

  And she did want to have sex with him already. But that decision was hers to make — whenever she was ready.

  “I feel horrible for that boyfriend of yours.” Wendy clucked with a giggle as she snapped a picture of Amanda on her iPhone, promptly posting it to Instagram. “It’s bad enough that he had to go this long without seeing you. Now he’s gotta see you for the first time in ages wearing this hot little number. Poor thing.”

  Amanda laughed. You have no idea, she thought with more guilt than amusement.

  After flying into New York to personally save Amanda in March, Liam had been due immediately back in Nebraska to continue shooting A Soldier the following day. Once that location wrapped, he’d had just two nights of down time before shipping off to Jordan, where his six weeks of shooting turned into eight thanks to an on-set injury that Amanda could only worry about from nearly six thousand miles away. So despite the fact that they’d been technically together for months, Amanda had yet to see Liam for more than three days straight – a schedule that didn’t allot much time for any real couple activities, such as having dinners or double dates or movie nights.